Showing posts from 2013

the sunday six: stuff i'm lovin'

one of my favorite things is a consumer review, especially from someone i actually know.  i know i'm not alone in that, so that is the service i'm freely offering to you today.  
next time you have to pay. 
(no you don't.)
 i am giving you my personal reviews on various and sundry items, which is all basically two thumbs up because that's what the sunday six is all about anyway.  a whole list of a bunch o' crap that i love. all for the price of: nothing. no one is paying me to say nice stuff or even sending me samples.  
ingrates, that's what they are.
anyway, let's get this thing under way!
//1 urban decay shadow primer a long while back i'd tried this product and thought "meh". i didn't understand the cult following.  true to form, i was using it incorrectly.  now, NOW, i see. i once was blind... blahblah. go get this.  i live in south louisiana where the humidity is infinity times infinity til death. when i wear this, my eyeshadow lasts …

a boy baby

well it turns out this baby is indeed a boy baby.

wait, let me back up.

the morning after i wrote my last post, i woke up completely blindsided by my own feelings of disappointment. deep disappointment.  i cried. i cried not because i reallllly wanted a girl, but because i felt frustrated and confused, and i cried because i felt so sad.  i've never had a gender preference.  i guess leading off with a boy and then a girl erased any pressure that might arise from "needing" to have one or the other.

but you know how you can feel so certain about something, so sure that your assessment is right?

have you ever been there?

it can leave you feeling shipwrecked.

totally lost in your own mind.
where what you think you know about a situation (so cocksure) can cast doubt and make you question what moments before you knew to be true about God?
nothing could move me from my position that i knew that this baby would be a girl.  we've since had another ultrasound and this is defini…

the God of disappointment?

when we first told the kids that we would soon have a new baby in the house, eden was the most excited.  sitting on the couch, curled up next to the arm, she sat up straighter and smashed her hands together real tight. i wish you could've seen her. "REALLY?!", she said, beaming.  then she fell onto the arm all dramatic like and said, "i'm so happy!!!" we all smiled with her.  and then she said, "i've been praying every night for a sister!"

today we had a sonogram.  i'm 17 weeks along, and although we couldn't really get a good shot of this fantastic little marvel (there was so much squirming going on!), there was some indication that this baby is a boy.

i'm going to need another sonogram in a few weeks to be convinced.  so many things pointed to this being a girl.  things like:

i've had a name in mind for years.  in some of the healing work i've been doing,  God has been dealing with some 'girl' issues, some of which …

more time, please.

a few months ago, all the kids needed new undies. (they'll love me for sharing that someday.) standing there looking at the character underwear, i ask noah which ones he wants. i could see he was standing back a little from the rack and when i asked he was like, "um, can i just get plain ones? i'm not really into the character ones anymore."  and just like that, at nine years old, he crossed over. 
no warning.  
no heads up so i could prepare my heart, and standing there in the aisle i felt the squeeze of the going away. 
it steals your breath. it does.
+ + + + + + +
this week, i walked into my room, to put myself to bed.  when i opened the door there was a box resting between my pillow and danny's.  

(there was also a little zipper pouch addressed to me, filled with dried rose petals.)
the box was addressed:
mom and dad, not mama and daddy
nothing could prepare me for what it contained.
i opened the box, and my heart lay inside. she put my heart in a box.


paint, chaos, and Bob Ross

ya'll.  years ago i went through a huge rachel ashwell phase.  HUGE. i mean, i wanted everything in my house to be white.  white walls, white trim, i wanted every piece of furniture to be painted white, white slip-covered duck cloth sofas, white painted floors even, and white candles! lots and lots of white candles!  i was drunk on The White.

and then i became sort of bored with that idea before it ever materialized, so maybe i have to revoke my "HUGE" assessment, seeing as i never actually put it into practice and how can one be a real fanatic but only in her mind?

anyway, i think it was the birthing of a couple kids, what deterred me.  not only that, i never really could sell danny on it, and  it was never in the budget to get rid of EVERYTHING we owned and start over.  which is what i tend to want to do when i get a wild hair.

as it stands, every room in our house is "colored" and i have really enjoyed that, but i'm beginning to feel a bit 'over it&…

tired + bossy. it's like i'm a teenager all over again.

sweet mother of pearl, i think i had forgotten the suffering of the first trimester. i keep trying to do stuff (bathe, brush my teeth, empty the sink, feed someone) and then ending up back on the couch or sleeping in my bed, lambasted.  i can barely make it to mid-day without sleeping at some point, and THAT after staying in bed 'til 9, so.

d calls throughout the day to check in on us and even the shortest of conversations is exhausting to me. the simple act of vocalizing, insufferable.  i am delightful.

we should've told everyone sooner about the pregnancy, like maybe the day we found out about it. yeah, that's the day we should've gone public because then when i say that i'm happy about it people might actually believe me.
right now i get a quizzical look.  'oh, wow... congratulations.  are y'all excited? i mean, how do y'all feel about it?'  i know their confusion is because of my face.

well, it's not exactly incontrovertible.  my face, that…

the sunday six: edition 47 | i should really be dusting.

so i'm pregnant, and i have a head cold.  it's a very particular brand of "not feeling so hot".  i have logged more hours on the couch in the past week than i care to admit.
..sitting on the couch staring into space or crawling back into bed and napping.  lots of hours.
the kids, bless their hearts (and hungry bellies), ask how long i'll be sick.  i say, with as much enthusiasm as i can muster, with them i was sick for 3 months but hope it doesn't last that long this time.  they're understandably horrified at 2 more months of this madness (as am i) but mostly i think they're worried about getting to eat something besides sandwiches and cereal they made for themselves.  
my little one asked me today if he could have marshmallows and bread for lunch.  he wanted a marshmallow sandwich.  he was not happy when i said no.
i'm hoping most of the misery is the cold though because that won't last as long.  maybe it's just wishful thinking though. …