11.17.2010

Remember that time I went to New York and never told y'all about it?

La Grande Pomme
[Originally set to post June 2009]

I just returned from NYC.

New Yawk Sit-tay!

(Before you start believing lies about me though, let me make this disclaimer--  I am no ubiquarian.
I have not seen the globe, or even most of the country. [Yet.]
And no, this trip did not in any way have anything to do with promoting my book.
I have 18 followers, people. I am not a famous person.)

ubiquarian -- a person who goes everywhere

The real reason we went is because My Sister the Genius graduated to become the Sister Genius and Best Nurse On the Entire Sphere of the Earth.  [SGaBNOtESotE for short.]  This was my first time up to New Yawk. What a city! It was humongous and unpredictable and it smelled both delicious and disgusting. We had ourselves a good time, kenching and yamming for five days scraight (that is not a typo).
kench -- to laugh loudly

to yam -- to eat of stuff heartily

One of my favorite things was the Met(ropolitan Museum of Art). The oil paintings were spectacular. They're enormous... I was all astonishment! My favorite single thing in the museum though, was a long banner, probably fifteen feet in length, of the genealogy of Jesus. From Adam down the line... all the way to the birth of Christ. It was stunning. I was so disappointed to find out they had not a single replica in the bookstore. They don't even make it. It's the one thing I really wanted to bring back. I'm (still) still disappointed about that...

While there, we also saw Swan Lake (beautiful and also got an acute case of the giggles because we were nodding off)(What? It was dark up in there and Mama was tired!), the view of Manhattan from the top of the Rockefeller Center, walked through FAO Schwarz and Central Park, ate my first gelato in an authentic Italian restaurant that served homemade pasta, took the dinner cruise to get a close-up of Lady Liberty (she's so beautiful), ate hot dogs on the street, rode the subway (which smells of many a gambrinous man's watering hole), went to Chinatown (twice), ate at Tavern on the Green (which served us bread and BUTTER BALLS! Amen.) and Carnegie Deli (sandwiches bigger than my head), and much more.  One more event worth noting was our trip to Tiffany's where the elevator operator made sure to let us know that the Sterling Silver was on the 5th Floor.  I said, "Really?  'Cause I was here fo' da yella diamond!  That, or you know, the Clearance Aisle." I did.  I totally said that in my head. 

gambrinous -- full of beer

Oh, and the driving-- it is so amusing! Frightening too, since no one seems to operate by any road rules. It's fantastic!! I would've wrecked in 40 seconds or fewer.

Here's a couple snippity snaps of our time there:
The Brooklyn Bridge
It took us a while to figure out which bridge (so many bridges!) was, in fact, The Brooklyn Bridge and that delighted us more than you could ever imagine.  Maybe though, imagining won't be so hard when you see this next picture, because The Silliness, it is Our Strong Suit. 
This was taken on the evening of our fant-cee Dinner Cruise.  What can I say except fancy makes us stupid, and stupid is my favorite.


And in conclusion, thank you Jesus, that all of our planes were volacious and that I no longer have those bangs. Amen and Hallelujah.

volacious - Apt or fit for flying. 

8 comments:

  1. ok, you little stinker!!!! you wrote a BOOK . . .
    and didn't tell me??????

    unbelievable. don't they teach you all any
    manners down there?

    to show how upset i am, i just ordered one!

    this is my fourth early Christmas gift. if you
    want to know the other three, you have to
    TELL me the next time you write a BOOK.

    love,
    lea

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  2. Oh my gosh!! You wrote a book!! You crack me up with your blogs, now I get to laugh all the way through a book...it's like Christmas in November!! Great job and congrats on the book!! I'm going to buy it right now!! Merry Christmas to me! :)

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  3. Thank you both! You got me smiling all over my face. :)

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  4. hahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
    hahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
    hahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

    now that i've caught my breath...

    (speech) It is such an honor to be honored as the honorary SGaBNOtESotE tonight. I'd like to thank the Academy for its' diligence in sticking by me whilst my genius was honed. And I can't leave here without crediting my sister, "The Best One" with producing the most kenching from me than anyone else in all the land, and for her constant shenanigannery. I love you and I can't say thank you enough.

    That picture makes me laugh EVERY TIME!
    I dream of the day of our triumphant return to that wonderful piece of prope'ty.

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  5. J: Haste the day of our return to the land of propriety!

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  6. Ah, we finally know. Sounds like a fun trip - maybe with the exception of the stink in the subway.

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  7. Bren: I know... did the wait keep you up at night? Like my slacking did me? :) It WAS a great trip. I'm ready to go back. It was fantastic.

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    ReplyDelete